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"Cats" and all related things are the property of Andrew Lloyd Webber, The Really Useful Group, and related parties. Lyrics are taken from and based off "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats" and other poems by T.S. Eliot, with additions by Trevor Nunn and Richard Stilgoe. No copyright infringement is intended.
The Rum Tum Tugger
Sung by: The Rum Tum Tugger, Quaxo, Bombalurina and The Company (London, Video)
The Rum Tum Tugger, the toms, Bombalurina and The Company (Broadway, Australia)
Original London Cast
Original Broadway Cast
Original Australian Cast
Video




The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat:
If you offer me pheasant, I'd rather have grouse
If you put me in a house, I would much prefer a flat
If you put me in a flat, then I only want a house
If you set me on a mouse, then I only want a rat
If you set me on a rat, then I'd rather chase a mouse


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any call for me to shout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore:
When you let me in, then I want to go out
I'm always on the wrong side of every door
As soon as I'm at home, then I like to get about
I like to lie in the bureau drawer,
But I make such a fuss if I can't get out


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any use for you to doubt it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast:
My disobliging ways are a matter of habit
If you offer me fish, then I only want a feast
When there isn't any fish, then I won't eat rabbit
If you offer me cream, then I sniff and sneer
For I only like what I find for myself... mmm
So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears
If you put it away on the larder shelf


The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing,
The Rum Tum Tugger

Doesn't care for a cuddle
But I'll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing
For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle.


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

And there isn't any need for me to spout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about... about...
About it!





The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat:
If you offer me pheasant, I'd rather have grouse
If you put me in a house, I would much prefer a flat
If you put me in a flat, then I'd rather have a house
If you set me on a mouse, then I only want a rat
If you set me on a rat, then I'd rather chase a mouse


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any need for me to shout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore:
When you let me in, then I want to go out
I'm always on the wrong side of every door
As soon as I'm at home, then I like to get about
I like to lie in the bureau drawer,
But I make such a fuss if I can't get out


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any need for you to doubt it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast:
My disobliging ways are a matter of habit
If you offer me fish, then I always want a feast
When there isn't any fish, then I won't eat rabbit
If you offer me cream, then I sniff and sneer
For I only like what I find for myself... no
So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears
If you put it away on the larder shelf


The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing,
The Rum Tum Tugger

Doesn't care for a cuddle
But I'll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing
For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle.


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

And there isn't any need for me to spout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about... about... about...
About it!





The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat:
If you offer me pheasant, I'd rather have grouse
If you put me in a house, I would much prefer a flat
If you put me in a flat, I would rather have a house
If you set me on a mouse, then I only want a rat
If you set me on a rat, then I'd rather chase a mouse


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any call for me to shout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore:
When you let me in, then I want to go out
I'm always on the wrong side of every door
As soon as I'm at home, then I like to get about
I like to lie in the bureau drawer,
But I make such a fuss if I can't get out


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any use for you to doubt it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast:
My disobliging ways are a matter of habit
If you offer me fish, then I only want a feast
When there isn't any fish, then I won't eat rabbit
If you offer me cream, then I sniff and sneer
For I only like what I find for myself... mmm
So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears
If you put it away on the larder shelf


The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing,
The Rum Tum Tugger

Doesn't care for a cuddle
But I'll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing
For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle.


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

And there isn't any need for me to spout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about... about... about...
About it!

Meow!

Meow!


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat:
If you offer me pheasant, I'd rather have grouse
If you put me in a house, I would much prefer a flat
If you put me in a flat, then I'd rather have a house
If you set me on a mouse, then I only want a rat
If you set me on a rat, then I'd rather chase a mouse


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any call for me to shout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore:
When you let me in, then I want to go out
I'm always on the wrong side of every door
And as soon as I get home, then I like to get about
I like to lie in a bureau drawer,
But I make such a fuss if I can't get out


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
And there isn't any use for you to doubt it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about it

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast:
My disobliging ways are a matter of habit
Now if you offer me fish, then I always want a feast
And if there isn't any fish, then I won't eat a rabbit
If you offer me cream, then I sniff and sneer
For I only like what I find for myself... no
So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears
If you put it away on the larder shelf


The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing,
The Rum Tum Tugger

Doesn't care for a cuddle
So I'll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing
'Cause there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle.


The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat -
The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

And there isn't any need for me to spout it:
For he will do
As he do do

And there's no doing anything about... about... about...
About it!

Notes

Live versions generally have Tugger dance with a random member of the audience during the instrumental break halfway through - so if the choreography in that part of the video version seemed a bit odd to you, well, that's why. They had to improvise ;). Also, live versions generally start off the song with the girls squealing "Tugger!" when he first appears (kinda like how the video version has him announce his presence with a "meow~"). Just for the record..
Note that the 2014 London revival had an... alternate... version of this song - for some reason, they felt it necessary to change Tugger into a rapper. The nicest thing I can say about this version is that it gave me a whole new appreciation for the original... and that's all I'll say about it. If you want to know more about it, you'll have to look it up elsewhere - but don't say I didn't warn you ;) Luckily, the 2016 Broadway and 2017 International Tour productions revert back to the original version of the song. (Thank god!!!)