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"Cats" and all related things are the property of Andrew Lloyd Webber, The Really Useful Group, and related parties. Lyrics are taken from and based off "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats" and other poems by T.S. Eliot, with additions by Trevor Nunn and Richard Stilgoe. No copyright infringement is intended.
Macavity: The Mystery Cat
Sung by: Demeter and Bombalurina and the queen chorus
Original London Cast
Original Broadway Cast
Original Australian Cast
Video
Macavity!

Macavity's a mystery cat: he's called the Hidden Paw
For he's a master criminal who can defy the law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair
And when you reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air -
But I tell you once and once again,
Macavity's not there!


Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined in thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side,
With movements like a
snake;
And when you think he's half-asleep, he's always wide-awake!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of
depravity,
You may meet him in the by-street, you may see him in the square -
But when a crime's discovered, then
Macavity's not there!


He's outwardly respectable. (I know he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any files of Scotland Yard's.
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair -
There's the wonder of the thing:
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
There never was a cat of such deceitfulness and suavity
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare
Whatever time the deed took place, Macavity wasn't there.

And they say that all the cats whose wicked deeds are widely known

(I might mention Mungojerrie, Rumpelteazer, Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the cat who all the time
Just controls the operations: The Napoleon of Crime!


Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square
But when a crime's discovered then
Macavity's not there!


[Macavity Fight - instrumental]

We have to find Old Deuteronomy
Macavity!

Macavity's a mystery cat: he's called the Hidden Paw
For he's a master criminal who can defy the law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair
For when they reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when they reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in a basement, you may look up in the air -
But I tell you once and once again,
Macavity's not there!


Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined in thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side,
With movements like a
snake;
And when you think he's half-asleep, he's always wide-awake!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity,
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square -
But when a crime's discovered, then
Macavity's not there!


He's outwardly respectable. (I know he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any files of Scotland Yard's.
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair -
There's the wonder of the thing:
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
There never was a cat of such deceitfulness and suavity
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare
Whatever time the deed took place, Macavity wasn't there.

And they say that all the cats whose wicked deeds are widely known

(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the cat who all the time
Just controls the operations: The Napoleon of Crime!


Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square
But when a crime's discovered,
Macavity, Macavity, Macavity
Macavity...!

When a crime's discovered, then
Macavity's not there!


[Macavity Fight - instrumental]

Macavity's not there

We have to find Old Deuteronomy
Macavity!

Macavity's a mystery cat: he's called the Hidden Paw
For he's a master criminal who can defy the law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair
For when they reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air -
But I tell you once and once again,
Macavity's not there!


Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side,
With movements like a
snake;
And when you think he's half-asleep, he's always wide-awake!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of
depravity,
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in a square -
But when a crime's discovered, then
Macavity's not there!


He's outwardly respectable. (I know he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any files of Scotland Yard's.
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair -
There's the wonder of the thing:
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
There never was a cat of such deceitfulness and suavity
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare
Whatever time the deed took place, Macavity wasn't there.

And they say that all the cats whose wicked deeds are widely known

(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the cat who all the time
Just controls the operation: The Napoleon of Crime!


Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in a square
But when a crime's discovered, then
Macavity, Macavity, Macavity
Macavity...!

When a crime's discovered, then
Macavity's not there!


[Macavity Fight - instrumental]

We have to find Old Deuteronomy
Macavity!

Macavity's a mystery cat: he's called the Hidden Paw
For he's a master criminal who can defy the law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair
For when they reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime -
Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air -
But I tell you once and once again,
Macavity's not there!


Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side,
With movements like a
snake;
And when you think he's half-asleep, he's always wide-awake!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of
depravity,
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square -
But when a crime's discovered, then
Macavity's not there!


He's outwardly respectable. (I know he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any files of Scotland Yard's.
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair -
There's the wonder of the thing:
Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
There never was a cat of such deceitfulness and suavity
He always has an alibi, and one or two to spare
Whatever time the deed took place, Macavity wasn't there.

And they say that all the cats whose wicked deeds are widely known

(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the cat who all the time
Just controls the operations: The Napoleon of Crime!


Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square
But when a crime's discovered, then
Macavity, Macavity, Macavity
Macavity...!

When a crime's discovered, then

Macavity's not there!

[Macavity Fight - instrumental]

Macavity's not there

We have to find Old Deuteronomy
Notes

I'm not sure who says the first "Macavity!" in any of the CD versions.